You tell me

What are they trying to sell here? This was an add I found on the internet.

Don't ever say that they don't use sex to sell. Not that you would say that anyway.

Mystery

Every Friday, we get donuts at our office. It's a great perk from a company that all ready supplies me Coca-Cola all day. Notice I didn't just say Coke, for fear of a random search that would lead to a visit from the local authorities. Most Fridays, after the first wave of employee's have taken their donut of choice, there are always a few stragglers that weren't selected, either because people are gone so there are extras, or because that particular donut just doesn't appeal to anyone. Now the rest of the day, those donuts just sit there, getting dry, hard and having little chance of being taken. But there is something that happens to these donuts, that confuses me. If you watch them, they start to disappear, not one at a time, but piece by piece. Here is a shot I took after the first wave. You will notice that there is a knife in the box, which is weird.

I left and came back awhile later.

You can see that we have lost a piece of this donut. I came back a bit later and you can see we have a second victim.

A little later and you can see that a second attack on this cherry filled donut has occurred.

Then we have a third victim.

You can see that some of the "bites" are small, so I'm not sure why they are doing it. I mean, would you go into an office break room and pick up a donut that has been hacked up by who knows who? My thought is, either take the whole donut or stick to the diet you are trying to be true too. As the day goes on, these donuts disappear, so maybe other people don't mind eating them. Or, my guess is, the same person comes back again and again, taking it piece by piece. Maybe they think that if you take the entire day to eat a donut, that it somehow will not register the same number of calories. Here is my thought on all of this. Take the fricking donut to your desk and hack it up at your leisure, but I guess that's just me.

Dude, you said no more.

Hear me out, I'm not in the same shitter, this is different. Apparently my pictures and confusion has struck a cord with people, or at least Chad. Maybe we shouldn't judge the level of interest in this subject by him, since he was the one that took a picture of me using the facilities in South Africa.

That being said, Chad sent me a photo of another confusing placement of a toilet paper dispenser.

I've seen paper towel dispensers that aren't that high. I'm not sure if they were just trying to get it over the handicap poles, then didn't want to mess up the tiles, or if the guy hanging it has a torso that is 6 feet long, so this is the proper height while he is sitting down. Perhaps he only stands to get his paper. I'm not sure, but I did find this was worthy of a post, fits right in with most of my posts for the past month. I'm now on a mission to document all of the crazy stuff I see in bathrooms, so lock the stall if I'm with you.

No bathroom mentions in this post

I learned something yesterday, that I will need to keep in mind going forward. Makiah has never been to an actual football game and hasn’t seen very many on TV. Those that he has watched, I wouldn’t say he watched with undivided attention. This helps me in this way. I was mowing the grass last night and came across a football in my path, so not wanting to kill the engine to move it, I whistled for Makiah who was playing nearby so he could come move it. Is that lazy? Of course, but that isn’t the issue. He grabbed the football and I decided that I would show my manly manliness and whistled for him to toss the ball to me. I then killed the engine, which I was too lazy to do a minute ago, and punted the football across the yard. Now I have a pretty big yard, and Makiah was mightily impressed, giving me an ego boosting “Whoaaaaaaa!” I started the mower and proceeded on my way. The issue here is, Makiah’s perception of what is a big kick. Since he hasn’t seen a real game, it appears I’m the Worlds Best Punter, which is where my lesson comes in. I should NEVER take Makiah to a real football game or allow him to watch any punting on TV. I will keep my status as the Worlds Best Punter, he never needs to know the truth. A dad always wants to be the hero in their kids eyes, this is one way I can pad my stats and hopefully help make up for the lost points when I can’t do something. Perhaps he will think, “At least he can kick a football really far.” As long as he never sees a real kicker, he will never know that my 10 yard punt will get you nothing. Except for maybe a contract to kick for the Washington Redskins. Sorry, still bitter about last week’s loss.