Are you stupid?

Let me start off by saying, I love my job. I love the company I work for and the people I work with. That being said, some of them do things that I either don't understand, or they are not thinking.

1. I get emails from lots of people who are pointing out a task that needs to be done. That is all fine and good, but occasionally I get the infamous "See below" direction. I have no problem reading the previous email, or even a couple, but I get a string of back and forth emails about a subject, that at times, can be several pages long. How am I supposed to decipher what of those emails, is what you are wanting me to "See?" I count myself as a pretty bright guy. I mean, I've never shot myself, or even seriously injured myself in several years, so I would think that I could figure out a small mystery buried in an email. But sometimes, there are several paths these emails take and I'm not sure which direction I need to go. I usually have to ask, "see what?" and look like a total ass, because I don't say, "Hey, shoot a brother a clue on what you are talking about." I want to say "Are you stupid? Do you see that you have been having a conversation with subject "B" for a month, never figured anything out, then toss it over to me to break "it" down." Sorry, no comprende.

2. My cube sits by a door that leads outside. In the spring, summer and fall, this is a great seat. We prop open the door, since none of our windows open, and let in some fresh air. It's like working in a Vegas hotel, none of the windows open and I'm guessing it was to avoid former employees from escaping, but I can't say for sure. The time that my particular seat sucks, is in the winter. Where do I live? Iowa. What happens in Iowa in the winter? It gets cold as ass. Now put me in dress pants and business casual shirt and what do you get? Pneumonia. This isn't the front door, but a side door that leads to our loading dock. So why does it get opened 100 times a day to freeze my giblits off? Couple of reasons. The first is that truckers can't seem to figure out the 5 signs posted on the door telling them that this particular door is not an entrance. It is locked, so you have to have a pass key to open it. That, however, doesn't stop a truck driver from pulling on it like it's some sort of bar game to test your pulling strength. I swear I think they are going to pull it off the hinges. They give it a tug, and the lock informs them that the signs weren't shitting them, it's NOT and entrance. For most people, that would be the clue to follow the sign that has arrows pointing to the right, to the actual door they need to use, but alas, it does not. They take the grip of the lock as a challenge and tug again, again, and again. Hello, dip stick, the door doesn't unlock if you jerk on it 5 times, it's frigging locked, period. They finally give the cupped hands to the glass to look in and try to get someone to open it. I have taken to ignoring them in hopes that they will look at the sign and follow the directions. Sometimes, this just doesn't happen, so I have to open the door, let in the cold, and tell them to go to the other door. Since most of these people don't speak English, I have to break out my sign language skills and make the "You are at the wrong door" hand and arm motions, trying to get them to go to the next door. Usually, I just give up and point them through the indoor path to the warehouse, which they always seem to understand. Go figure. The second reason this door is repeatedly opened, is our warehouse people think of it as their personal door, to open and close as much as they like throughout the day. They have jeans and sweatshirts on, so they aren't nearly as cold as I am. They use it to go to lunch, come back from lunch, and to just meander outside every 20 minutes. Not sure why they can't use their door, but hey, lets not be door snobs, lets use them all. I've spoken to the guy who is the biggest offender, but he seems to forget and continues his laps. He goes out my door, walks over to the warehouse door and back into the building, only to repeat the circle 10 or 20 times a day. This guy does the Indianapolis 500 everyday, as I sit in the pits, not happy. Third reason, smokers. Lets not get into a long post on how the smokers get away with hours of breaks a day, that I do not, since I gave up the habit so many years ago. The area outside my door has a little roof, so it is protected from the rain. Their normal smoking spot does not. Every time it rains or snows, the smokers decide that my door leading to the covered area is their new found paradise, so I get the arctic blast several more times. This time, the blast is now menthol, so I have that going for me. I guess I see their point. I mean for health reasons, you don't want your smokers standing in the rain. That might make them sick.

3. I deal with a lot of outside people. By that I mean, they work outside of my building. Most of them are in warehouses around the country. We don't own the warehouses, we just contract with them to provide services for us. Some of them are great. You ask a question, they send you an answer. You ask for a service, they give you said service. But then there are some that treat my emails as a disease that needs to be eliminated as soon as they receive it. No need in replying, this email must have been sent from the devil and it's best to just get rid of it before it infects our whole system, or makes us work. I have a couple of warehouses that ignore my first 2 emails completely, so I schedule out 3 emails, which is when I know they will respond. I've been asked, why don't you call them? Good question. The answer is, because they don't answer their phone. Or if they do, they have absolutely no idea what I'm talking about. The biggest problem is, they will deny they ever spoke to me, if it comes down to a he said, she said, situation. I want the email response for my records, so I plug on. I can't tell you how frustrating it is to try and do the best job you can, but the people you rely on for the information to do your job correctly, could give a rats ass whether you get the correct info, or any info, at all. Someone needs to invent an email attachment that when they open it, my hands spring from their screen and strangle them until they submit to my will. Or maybe I could just use their keyboard to get what I want. Yeah, maybe that would be better.