Mothers day

What can I say about Mothers Day that hasn't been said in thousands of cards published by Hallmark? I'm torn anymore. Seeing as how my mother is no longer with us, this day brings a little sadness to me, and I'm guessing to some of you as well. Even if you are a mother, which would bring happiness, if your mother is gone, it still stings. I loved my mom. I learned a lot from her and like to think that my serving through missions was from her. My mom went to several places to serve God, India, Russia (when it was still Communist), China and was working on a Jamaica trip when she died. She taught me that God wants us to serve those less fortunate than ourselves, which I hope I make her proud with the work I try to do. I'd like to think that my work ethic came from her (It most certainly DID come from my dad)and the patience that I have for the a'holes in my life was passed on from her. I still remember about 6 months after she died, I was in a tree cutting down a branch that had broken off from an ice storm, when it occurred to me, I can't get down. You might think that was a funny time to think of my mom, and no I wasn't wanting my mommy. I knew that she would laugh at the story, probably call me a dumbass which I most certainly was, and I would get to hear her laugh the laugh that I loved so much. Not that she had a unique laugh, but I just liked to hear it. My biggest regret isn't that we fought all the time when I was a teenager or that I didn't visit her much when I first moved out on my own. My biggest regret is that my kids will never know her. That when I tell the story of how she tried to make homemade rolls once, they turned into hockey pucks (her term) which ruined a food processor when she tried to chop them up to feed the birds, my kids won't get to hear her laugh and tell me they weren't "that" bad. Maybe the story of how an exploding bowl of gazpacho went all over our dining room with it's red tomatoey mess, minutes before a party was to begin. Or how she ripped the lights out of a Boston airport parking garage with our Winnebago, blacking out the area. She loved to tell those stories, I guess that is where I get that side of me. As soon as I do something stupid, I'm trying to figure out a way to tell everyone to make them laugh. My mom was a strong woman, both physically and mentally. She fought cancer for years, did the chemo, had the surgeries and kept on going. She had a deep faith and shared it with anyone who would listen, and even with those of us that wouldn't. I'm one of the few people I know that can look back at their childhood and not have a list of issues with my parents. The only sad thing was my parents divorce, but life, get ready, is what it is. I love and miss you mom. See you soon, but not too soon:)