Here is today's winner. The lady driving this looked back at her masterpiece and smiled, she was so proud.

New picture

A quick post before Marcy sees me. I made it home from Atlanta with little other excitement. I did have a Nathans hot dog at the airport and ordered it with "slaw." If you read my posts from El Paso, you know I fell in love with a chili slaw dog there, so I thought this would be a twist on that, no chili. Well let me tell you that "Nathan" has no idea what slaw is. The slaw at Nathan's is kraut, which I love as well, but not slaw. Oh well, it was not bad for airport food. They had a seafood restaurant, but I wasn't sure airport fresh seafood would be good, took a pass. The reason I don't want Marcy to see me, is she is the latest entry into the parkers hall of fame. This isn't horrible, but still.

You may notice that she is on her way out of the car and I'll tell you it wasn't to give me a hug. I was beaten severely shortly after this picture was taken. The worst part of this picture, that's my matchbox car that she is door dinging on the left. Luckily, there were no noticeable chips in the paint or I would have had to, well, not do anything, but I'd have been plenty mad inside. I give her a hard time, but she is actually a good driver considering she is probably on the phone and drinking a drum of coffee while she is driving. To her defense, you can see that the driver on her right is on the line, causing her to have to move over. Yes, lets go with that.

Atlanta

Why do I insist in getting to the airport way earlier than I need to? I think I’m afraid I’ll run into some problems, so I over compensate. Today I got to the airport and was surprised to see that there was no line at the ticket counter, that’s a first for me. Even when I’ve gotten to the counter at 4:30am in El Paso this past Feb., there were people there. Here I am at the Des Moines International airport with an hour and a half to wait, and I’ve even eaten lunch here all ready. I’ve never had to wait more than 10 minutes to get through security, but I still buy into the “Get there 2 hours early” scam. I think it’s a way to sell more stuff, like food, gum and magazines. If I hadn’t brought enough to read, I’d be looking for something to help me kill the extra 2 hours I have to just sit. And how do I turn off the pad on this laptop so every time I touch it, it doesn’t think I’m hitting the mouse key? If you have a laptop with a pad instead of a mouse, you know what I’m talking about. If you don’t, I’m not sure how to describe it any better, but I’ll tell you it’s annoying as hell. This is a new laptop, issued by my work, and I can’t remember how to shut it off, so I’m regularly highlighting when I don’t want to. Plus, it keeps dealing me my next round of cards on Spider Solitaire that I’m not ready for, dammit.

I did learn something new about myself today. Apparently, I have the ability to pick the best places to sit while waiting for a plane. As I arrived at my gate, the waiting area has seats for about 60 people spread out over an area that is quite large. I can’t sit in my seat and reach the seat across from me with my foot, so the rows are quite a ways part. When I arrived, there was one guy sitting in the area, the rest was completely empty. I picked a seat about 15 seats away from him, kind of in the corner and know where near the gate. Since I have sat down, I had a couple sit right across from me and another guy move, from the opposite side to 2 seats to my right. Another guy came in and sat 4 seats away. None of this is a big deal, but they all have jammed together leaving 2\3 of the waiting area empty, and I’m not next to anything. If I were near the gate, or say a spectacular view, maybe I see it, but no, nothing. I’m waiting for the next guy to ask if he can sit in my lap, oh wait, here he comes.

False alarm, he just wanted to sit next to me. Now the fire alarm has gone off, but everyone is just sitting here. I’m guessing there isn’t a fire, seeing as how the employees aren’t running outside. I’m afraid to go out there anyway. With all of the security measures, I’m afraid the airport security will see my life saving move as an attempt to sabotage the flight and I will be shot, no questions asked. Maybe if I screamed as I ran out onto the tarmac, others would follow, making my move a little less threatening. My fear there would be, no fire and having to come back into the terminal with everyone staring at me. I guess I could pray for a fire, so I wouldn’t be embarrassed, but that seems a tad bit selfish.

I’m now in the Milwaukee and every time I hear that name, it makes me think of Wayne’s World and Alice Cooper talking about the Indians. This is my first time here, but it’s just like everywhere else, the Coke is way expensive, my next flight has been delayed 50 minutes and the gate they listed, changed after I walked all the way down to it, then had to walk back. I saw people knocking over other people trying to get on the plane first, always confuses me. Then watched those same people stand up as soon as the plane stopped. Our flight attendant had to tell people 4 times while we were taxing to our gate, that you have to leave your seat belt on until the little light goes out. By the fourth time, she was pissed, but I still heard the sounds of unbuckling while we were still moving. The guy across the isle from me was kind of worrying me. If you read my post from when I came back from El Paso in Feb., you know that the guy next to me was freaking out. The guy today was making all kinds or weird movements. He unbuckled as soon as we took off and got out of his seat. I was watching him to see if he made a movement towards the front of the plane, where the pilots sit (I don’t want to call it by its real name, because I’m afraid of how it’s spelled, that don’t look right to me). He looked down the isle, towards the back of the plane, then sat back down a re-buckled. I’m not sure what that was all about, but I kept my eye on him for the rest of the flight. There was a guy in the front of the plane that weighed about 350 pounds, so if the dude next to me made a move, I was going to yell “Twinkies in the isle,” and I figured he jump up and seal off any attempt for the front of the plane.

Just saw a dude in a skirt, no shit. I thought that maybe it was weird shorts, but I kept looking at him and sure enough, skirt. Now I’m hoping that he comes back by so I can snap a picture with my phone. Sorry, no go, back on the plane to Atlanta.

The rest of the trip was non-eventful. I did ride in a van with a guy who referred to the 12 Disciples as Jesus posse, first time I had ever heard that. He was full of stories and maybe full of something else as well. I'm finally in my room, but I have no idea what time it really is. My clock is flashing, my phone says 10:30, but the news isn't on. Must be back on east coast time where prime time starts at 8pm and the news isn't on until 11pm. Now I remember that I hated that when I lived on the east coast and I think that feeling has gotten stronger as I have aged. At least I don't have to be ready until 10:30am, maybe I can sleep in a little. I know I'll be starving because I've had a bag of pita chips for supper and that aint cuttin it.

I mentioned sometime ago, that I was asked to be on the board of directors for a local ministry that happens to have a radio station that I listen to regularly. Well I'm now on the board and had my first meeting. It's very interesting to be a part of and I hope I can contribute to the cause. For those of you that want to check it out, here is the website:

http://www.pulse995.com/


Read the mission, it will help you to understand what the ministry is all about. If you have any questions, let me know, I'd be glad to talk about it. Those of you that are local, I'll be talking to you soon about the opportunity to help support this ministry that is trying to bring people to Christ through today's music, both Christian and secular. If you are sceptical that music can play a part in a persons growth or its ability to bring you closer to Christ, let me tell you that I'm living proof it can. Early on, in my return to the church, I was amazed at the growth of Christian music from what I knew it as a kid. I'm not much into hymns anymore. I grew up with the hair bands of the 80's and love the feel of that music. Now I know that there are bands that have the beat and rhythm that I fell in love with, only the lyrics are positive and powerful. There are a lot of songs that deal with the same struggles I go through everyday. I'm really not into the negative lyrics of so many bands that are out on mainstream radio anymore, its just my personal growth as a human and a Christian. Now I've been asked to help make this radio station reach it's target audience, which is young non-believers or young people in general, to help with their growth. This being said, one of my responsibilities is to be sure that, financially, the station stays around to employ the people at the station and try to reach those that need reaching. I don't know all of the ins and outs, but my guess would be that seeing as how it is Christian, a lot of non-Christian businesses or businesses that are afraid to be affiliated with the station, won't advertise. I haven't heard that from any one, but that would be my guess. I feel it is my duty, in fact we are told in the bible, to grow the kingdom, whether it be by giving financially to a ministry or by going out and making disciples. I like to do both, although my financial giving is stretched thin. If you are looking for something to help support, I ask you to read the mission statement, listen to the station, ask me questions, and pray to God for guidance. Now I'll get off my soapbox, for now.

I saw two license plates last week that made me laugh. One was on a little squareish yellow car and the plate was, SPNGBOB, cute. Then, for you Seinfeld fans, there was one that said MULVA. If that isn't funny to you, you can't call yourself a Seinfeld fan.

We are now in the middle of Memorial weekend and I have a lot of people to remember. This weekend brings back memories of the Indy 500, both while we lived in Indianapolis and times we watched the race on TV once we moved away. I always get a funny feeling when it is on. It was the only race that Mom and my step-father Bill, would watch, not big race or sports fans. We always watched the race. This weekend brings back memories of Dad, Grandma's and Grandpa's and even childhood memories of people and places from long ago. I can say that now that I recently realized that I will be 40 years old this year. I've never been one to worry about, or act, my age, but 40 seems like it might cause me to consider the possibility that depends are in my near future. Not that 40 is that old (sorry to my sisters and brother who have reached this age so gracefully), but it seems like 20 was just yesterday and I'm afraid 60 will come tomorrow and I'm not ready for that yet. I guess I shouldn't worry about turning 40, when it isn't a sure thing. My vacation is quickly approaching and the 2 weeks away, much of it spent in a minivan, may send me to my grave way earlier. I've made the final payment on the rental house, so none of us can back out now. Marcy and I have planned our trip down with a few stops for sightseeing, one at an aquarium in KY and a few national parks, then it's off to NC for 2 nights and one day in an ocean front hotel and then on to the house with the whole Shrum clan. First, I head to Atlanta on Tuesday for a quick trip into one of my warehouses, back home on Wed. Then I have a week in CA before the 2 weeks on the road and in NC. I think June will wear me out, but it should be a lot of fun. I hope to post from GA on Tuesday, I'm sure I'll sit next to either head shit handler at the local treatment plant, who just got off work, or Chatty Cathy who is completely comfortable in sharing details of all of her bodily functions with me. Stay tuned.

A smile is worth everything.

I had one of those "Dad" moments yesterday, that I had to share. Mason is on a baseball team, and even though he doesn't seem to be paying any attention to the game during the game, he says he is having fun playing. Lets just say that Mason doesn't excel at baseball. I'm not convinced he even cares, he just wants to play. So we are at his game last night and he hits the ball 2 of the 3 times he is at bat, which is a huge improvement from Saturdays game when he was 0-3 with 3 strike outs. He might be the slowest kid in the whole league, so unless there is an error, which there usually is, he won't make it to first base before the ball does. His first at bat, 4 errors allowed him to get to 1st. Second at bat, dribbler to the pitcher who picked it up and threw it to first, out. I must say that the pitcher and first baseman for the 8 and under WDM Indians are the 2 best players in our league, as far as I've seen. As Mason runs from 1st to the dugout, he passes the pitcher who just threw him out. I see this kid stick out his had to give Mason a high five. New respect for this kid and his parents. Mason told me that the kid said "Nice try,"(no sarcasm) which I thought was cool. Marcy told me later that it's a kid in Mason's class, but still, the kid could have said, as Mason told me, "Nice try, sucker!" I don't know where he comes up with that, but its funny. The "Dad" moment was after the game. Mason was coming around the back stop with his snack, I leaned down and told him what a good job he did, and he had the biggest grin. You hear that the smallest things said can make all of the difference and it's times like this that makes you realize how true that is. If we were to focus on the one strike out, the 2 contacts with the ball would be missed, even if we said something good about it later. I really try to focus on the good, in everything, not just Mason's baseball, but I don't think the impact will be as noticeable as it was right then. You want so much for your kids, but when they struggle, you feel helpless to help them. I can't make Mason a great baseball player, I don't have the knowledge and he is a bit lacking in the speed department, but hopefully I can help him be a better person.

Are we missing life?

The sermon at church this week hit home, which it would for you had you heard it. If you have an iPod, you can access it from iTunes, just look up Lutheran Church of Hope and find this weeks sermon. It talked about how we are filling our lives with so much, both material and time consuming, stuff. He gave the example of how his oldest son is graduating from high school, and it was just yesterday that he was starting preschool, or so it seems. I'll give you a little run down of my week, from Wed. on. Yours is probably busier than mine, but don't brag. If you beat this, you are worse off than me, and I'm exhausted.

Wednesday. Of course there is work, but I started my day at 5am so I could meet my friend Joe for breakfast, which was the best thing I did all day. Worked until 5pm and headed to church to finish off the marriage class that Marcy and I had been taking for several weeks. Got home, put the boys to bed, paid bills, but was in bed at a reasonable 10:30pm.

Thursday. Started off at 5am again, this time I needed to get to work so I could make up some time that I missed on Tuesday when we had a doctors appointment for Mason. Finished around 4:30, got home in time to load up the boys to head to the WDM Police open house. (more on that below) Got home at 7:30 in time to get the boys ready for bed, read books, brush teeth and all of that. Again, got to bed at a reasonable 10:30pm.

Friday. Worked a regular day, about 7am to 4pm, went home to load up the boys and head to Altoona for a birthday party, mentioned in an earlier post. Got home at 10pm, was asleep by 12am.

Saturday. I was actually able to play 18 holes of disc golf, but had to go at 8am so I could get it in. We had a baseball game at 12pm, but first I had to drive back out to Altoona to pick up Mason and Makiah, who had spent the night at Uncle Brian and Aunt Mindy's house. (Thanks guys, they had a great time) The game is from 12pm to 1pm, once the game was over, Marcy dropped me off at home so I could shower, since I hadn't after 18 holes of disc golf. Then, they drove to a party that I met them at a little while later. (Funny, I discussed with our friend Mindy on how ALL of our lives are so busy while I was there) Left there, went home for 1/2 hour, then headed to church to hear the sermon that has me writing this boring post. Went home, made dinner and had just enough time to get the boys to bed in time to watch Man vs Wild on the Discovery channel, which cause Marcy to gag, literally, when she watched the guy on the show eat a snake that he had just killed, raw. She has a really low tolerance for gross stuff like that, so she actually gagged about 6 times. I thought for sure she was going to hurl and I would have loved every minute of it, but alas, she was able to hold down her cookies. I was up through the news on Saturday Night Live (yes I still watch it) and then I was out.

Sunday. Up at 7:30am, got the boys up a little after 8am so we could go pick up a girl Marcy and I know so I could give her a ride to work. Took the boys to Krispy Kreame for Daddy's idea of a nutritious breakfast. Thank God Marcy feeds them better than I do. I cave to, "Well, they'll eat it." mode of cooking. They eat a lot of peanut butter and jelly, spaghetti and pizza when I have them.(not all together) Toss in some macaroni and cheese on an off day and you pretty much have the menu I prepare for them. Haven't heard a complaint yet. Got home and started cleaning for company that was coming. Mowed the lawn, takes about one hour and forty-five minutes. Cussed at my weed wacker because I can't get the damn thing to start. I've used it several times this season, but for some reason, it has decided that it wants a rest, nice. Time for lunch. Whipped up an awesome batch of PB&J, but they did have salsa with their chips and there are vegetables in there, right? I'm working on laundry this whole time, so any down time I have is spent folding and throwing away the boys socks. I swear they wear holes in them faster that you could ever think possible. I finished the cleaning, then headed to Lowe's to buy a new spark plug for the f*%king weed wacker. Got home, put it in and jerked the cord until I thought I had dislodged a vertebrae, still not working. Said a few choice words and went in to shower and get ready for company. Company arrives, we grill out, eat and have a great evening of conversation with two couples from our small group. Do the dishes, clean the back yard of yogurt debris that was thrown from the deck by my two year old who thought it would be fun. Picked up all of the indoor toys that had been launched from the same said deck by my 5 year old. I caught him after he had all ready deposited many items in the yard below and told him to go down and pick them up, which he only did part of them. Argued with two of the boys, but was able to get them to bed, and I'm guessing, because I haven't heard them fight in over 10 minutes, they are asleep. Now I have an hour to kill and I spend it giving you a play by play, sorry.

My point is, this is crazy. See if you can find just 10 minutes, other than this hour smart ass, where I, or anyone in my house, was able to sit and be still. To be quite and enjoy the beautiful day God had given us. There wasn't. I'm exhausted. You might think that this was a fluke, well, in some ways it was, but it's not that uncommon for us, or you I'm guessing. I did get to play disc golf and I am forever grateful for the hour and a half I walked in nature, by myself, in the quite, and threw a little piece of plastic around, only loosing it twice and only splitting one of my disc's in half. (and it was my favorite one as well, go figure) I wish I could slow down, but I fear the only way my life will slow down is: A: The kids grow up and move out. B: I fake a serious illness that confines me to either a Lazyboy or the nearest disc golf course. C: I die. I'm kidding, but then again, there is truth in it as well. I constantly feel over whelmed with the "stuff I need to get done." Tell me I'm not alone, cause I know I'm not. How do we slow down? Are we all destined to run ragged until we have a break down?

I mentioned that we went to the WDM Police open house. It's not far from our house and the boys like to look at all of the vehicles they bring out. There is your typical fire engine, ambulance and police cars, but they also have a SWAT truck, mobile command center and our favorite, a National Guard helicopter. Makiah is really big into anything Army, so he damn near kicked the crap out of me when I lifted him up to see it over the crowd. He started kicking his feet, apparently trying to run in the air, to get too it. I put him down and he bolted.

Oh, they were giving out free bike helmets and Mason decided he would just go ahead and wear his the rest of the evening. Then, we watched the helicopter take off, and if you haven't ever seen that up close, I would highly recommend it. Especially if you are a guy, cool stuff. Makiah was in heaven.
We got a tour of the station, which sucked because the only thing anyone would want to see, the jail, was off limits because there were people "visiting." We did get to see all of the cubicles, which is extremely exciting if you have been living in the jungle for the last 30 years and had never seen one before. If you work in one, everyday, not some thing you'd like to view in your spare time. Oh wait, we did get to see the break room, almost forgot about that piece of excitement. The only interesting thing we saw, was the gun range, not bad. The cop giving the tour couldn't have been less informed unless he had joined the force that day. He was asked several questions, that I would figure a guy who had been there since they built it, would know. Not Johnny Tour Guide, he knew squat. The only answer he gave was, "I don't know." Hell, I could have given the tour, I know what a cubicle is, I can read the names on the name plates and if anyone asks something not dealing with the two items I just listed, I'd give them a big fat "I don't know." Maybe next year, I'll skip that part of the evening, only so much a guy can take.

Prayer request

My friend Bobbi is in South Africa doing mission work and has a little boy she needs prayer for. His name is Joanen, and instead of me trying to tell you the story, go to this link.

http://www.bobbisincapetown.blogspot.com/

God Bless!

Parking

So I showed you a picture of a guy who couldn't park and ranted on how it bothers me. My friend Chad posted that bad parkers bother him as well, so I'll challenge all of you to take pictures of bad parkers so we can share. Can't think that would be illegal, seeing as how we aren't doing anything with them other than having a laugh at their expense, but I might caution you on trying to snap a picture of a car with a license plate that says "KLLR1" or "NOSENSEOFHUMOR."(I'm not sure that will fit on a standard US license plate, but you get the picture)

Todays winner comes from the great state of California:

Thanks CA, glad you could come to Iowa and fit in so well. I watched him back in and was surprised that after several minutes, this was the best he could do.

My friend Chad also just got back from a trip to the great state of California and has a funny post about some customer service (hotel maid) that made me laugh. Customer service, or the lack of it actuall, has been a subject of many a post here. Take a look at his post and see if you agree, his tops all of mine, for now.

http://chadholtz.terapad.com/index.cfm?fa=contentNews.newsDetails&newsID=58452&from=list

Now a funny story.

I was at a party for my nephew, Oakley, Friday night. All of my sister in-laws family was there and they are so much fun. They remind me of my own family, always laughing and goofing around. Some of us were sitting at the kitchen table, including Job, my sister in-law Mindy's brother. He went out to the back deck to get the ketchup from the kids table for someone who wanted it. As soon as he got outside, someone said "lets do something to his food." I didn't hear one person say no, including his wife who was sitting right next to me. We were having Manwich, so you can see the possibilities were slim. However, I'm sure your first thought was probably Tabasco, but that would be mean. So they started to pour Tabasco on his sandwich while his other sister Jolie kept him occupied on the deck. When they were done, they let him in and he sat down for his fiery feast. He was several bites in when I noticed him wiping his mouth rather frequently. We are all holding back the laughter and waiting with anticipation. Now he says a line I'll never forget, "I don't remember Manwich being this spicy." We finally let the laughter out and told him what they did. He thought it was hilarious, what a good sport. As I read this story back, not as funny as I had hoped, but if you were there, I guarantee you would be laughing right now.

Very funny video.

Someone hurting themselves because they are stupid, is very funny to me. I'm sure when I get to the Pearly Gates, this will be brought up to me and I fear the out come of that lecture. That being said, this is funny as hell:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SWCLE-Nn0tU

Nice new hairdo dude! I laugh at myself when I do something stupid, so you are fair game in my book.

This is cool!

This was sent to me (Thanks Teresa) and I had to share. Maybe you have seen this before, I'm sure it's one of those internet things that go around, but you can check it out by Googleing it, plus the video they are talking about is on youtube. By the way, this isn't Teresa talking, just a forward, just to be clear.



A couple of days ago I was running (I use that term very loosely) on my treadmill, watching a DVD sermon by Louie Giglio...and I was BLOWN AWAY! I want to share what I learned....but I fear not being able to convey it as well as I want. I will share anyway.He (Louie) was talking about how inconceivably BIG our God is...how He spoke the universe into being...how He breathes stars out of His mouth that are huge raging balls of fire...etc. etc. Then he went on to speak of how this star-breathing, universe creating God ALSO knitted our human bodies together with amazing detail and wonder. At this point I am LOVING it (fascinating from a medical standpoint, you know.) .....and I was remembering how I was constantly amazed during medical school as I learned more and more about God's handiwork. I remember so many times thinking....'How can ANYONE deny that a Creator did all of this???' Louie went on to talk about how we can trust that the God who created all this, also has the power to hold it all together when things seem to be falling apart ...how our loving Creator is also our sustainer.And then I lost my breath.And it wasn't because I was running my treadmill, either!!
It was because he started talking about laminin.
I knew about laminin. Here is how wikipedia describes them: 'Laminins are a family of proteins that are an integral part of the structural scaffolding of basement membranes in almost every animal tissue.' You see....laminins are what hold us together....LITERALLY. They are cell adhesion molecules. They are what holds one cell of our bodies to the next cell. Without them, we would literally fall apart. And I knew all this already. But what I didn't know is what laminin LOOKED LIKE.But now I do. And I have thought about it a thousand times since (already)....
Here is what the structure of laminin looks like...AND THIS IS NOT a 'Christian portrayal' of it....if you look up laminin in any scientific/medical piece of literature, this is what you will see..

Now tell me that our God is not the coolest !!!
Amazing! The 'glue' that holds us together....ALL of us....is in the shape of the cross ! Immediately Colossians 1:15-17 comes to mind.

'He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by Him all things were created; things in heaven and on earth , visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by Him and for Him. He is before all things, and in Him all things HOLD TOGETHER. '
Call me crazy. I just think that is very, very, very cool. Thousands of years before the world knew anything about laminin, Paul penned those words. And now we see that from a very LITERAL standpoint, we are held together...one cell to another....by the cross. You would never in a quadrillion years convince me that this is anything other than the mark of a Creator who knew EXACTLY what laminin 'glue' would look like long before Adam even breathed his first breath!! We praise YOU, Lord !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

That is cool!

COME ON!!!!!, Part 2

As a companion to my last post, here in Iowa, we have a number you can call if you see someone littering. If there is one thing that pisses me off (actually, there are a bunch), is some guy tossing a bag of garbage out his car window because he doesn't want to wait until he gets home or until the next time he fills up his car with gas. There are trash cans everywhere, so there is no excuse to toss it out. I was merging onto the local interstate one day, about a year ago, when the guy in the pickup truck in front of me tossed a fast food bag, filled to the rim with garbage, right out the window. It hit the ground and blew up with a multi colored paper explosion. I didn't know about the phone number then, so I didn't call. Plus, I was busy dodging all this stuff in the road, which at that instant, I didn't know what he had thrown out, could have been glass or puppies, didn't want to find out by running over it. I see people daily, tossing there lit cigarettes out the window, and if you live in Iowa, and I see you do it, your getting called on. More of a fire hazard, in the dry summer months, than it is a garbage problem. ( a fire was started a few years back that they tied directly to a tossed cigarette, and I'm sure there are more) My opinion is, if you have the smoking habit, fine, but put it out in the ashtray, not on the highway. Don't tell me it messes up you car or God forbid, you have to empty the ash tray. It's your habit, not mine, so if you think it is messy or gross, stop it. I used to shit my pants when I was little, but that's gross, so I don't do it any more. You wouldn't expect to see me driving down the road with my ass out the window because I didn't want to dirty up my car or put the doodoo in the proper receptacle, now would you? Don't answer that, you know what I mean. When you call the number, you give details like car make and model, color, where you saw them litter, what they threw out and of course, license plate number. They then send that car owner a letter, telling them that they were "caught" littering and I'm guessing a long winded explanation as to why we shouldn't do that. There is no fine, seeing as how people would call in on their buddies, just so they would get a ticket. I'm not sure that the letter will change their habits, but it might. I love my state and I think it's beautiful, in its own no mountain, no ocean, kind of way. In the spring, the road sides are usually covered in natural wild flowers and right now, the grass is a deep shade of green. We don't need to see the marketing campaigns of cell phone companies or out dated McDonalds coupons, jammed in the bushes because some lazy guy couldn't wait 10 minutes to be next to a garbage can. I'm trying to teach my kids the same thing, one, don't shit in your pants, and two, don't litter.

COME ON!!!!!

As cars in America have gotten bigger, the parking lot people have been asses and have made the parking spaces, smaller. I'm sure you have noticed if you drive a bigger vehicle, that when you pull in, you have very little door clearance with the car next to you. I've noticed this with my minivan at the big mall by us. You can't just toss open your door or you'll sure as shit knock a huge dent in someones door. I, myself, have brought my car size down to that of a matchbox car with my purchase of the Ford Focus, so parking isn't an issue for me. Even with my small car, I see the limited "extra" space I have when I get out. Now knowing this, when I find a parking lot that actually has wide enough parking spaces to fit today's cars, I notice that I don't have to get skinny to get out of my door. I found this dream lot at a local convenience store, of all places, the other day. Now with this large spaces, you'd think that everyone would enjoy these and have no trouble getting their car in correctly, so all adjoining spaces could enjoy the same wiggle room. Take a look at this guys attempt:
I know it's a guy, because I saw him in the store, and guess what he was doing? Talking on his cell phone. This explains why he couldn't center his medium sized car in a large space, but doesn't piss me off any less. I don't think it would have bothered me as much, if just three spaces down, another guy hadn't done the same thing. I finally find a place that gives you a luxury parking space, and a non-multi tasker (can't talk on the phone AND park his car at the same time) mucks it up for the rest of us. Come on people, put down the cell phone. Your life isn't that interesting that you need to share it 24/7, take a break, park the car, get a snack, then call.

Mothers Day, part 2

The boys and I set out Sunday morning to pick up Marcy's mothers day gift. You might be thinking that I forgot or put it off until Sunday, but no, there is a method to my madness. If it is purchased ahead of time, I have to hide it, and most of my hiding places are in the basement, which is in mid construction right now. The other reason is, the boys can't keep a secret, even when they think they are. So we headed out to the mall at 10:30am, seeing as how the mall opens at 10am, right? Well, apparently the mall people didn't get the memo, so they decided not to open the stores until 11am. This wouldn't be a big deal, except I have 3 boys with lots of energy just itching to run loose in the mall. I often equate moving my boys from one place to another as like herding cats. There is no way they are going to go in the same direction at the same time. So I spent the better part of an hour trying to get Fluffy, Tinkerbell and Spaz to stay somewhat near me, out of the plants, not hanging on the rail that looks down to the first floor and not riding up and down the escalator. All of these things are laced with candy (catnip) or crack cocaine, because I was loosing the battle. There was a West Des Moines Police car in the middle that you could look in and ask questions of the police officers. The boys were strangely fascinated with the back seat of the patrol car, caused me to pray they never see that part of the car again. We finally got into the store we were there for, found the things I was looking for and I went to pay. While I'm chatting with the ladies at the counter and fending off the "last minute" comment, damn her, the boys are running around in a store with many breakables. I got Mason to stand by me, but the other too were still messed up on whatever was causing them to not listen to me, I think they call it birth. Max had decided to remove his coat and leave it some where. I sent Mason on a recovery mission and he found it. I mistakenly gave it back to Max as he ran by and told him he was responsible for it, since he refused to wear it. That would be fine if he was 9, or even say 7, but seeing as he is 2, he promptly left it some where again. Mason to the rescue a second time. I decided to swallow my pride, go against what I said I wasn't going to do (which was not carry his jacket), and held on to the jacket myself. This whole process seemed like an hour, but was actually only a few minutes. We headed back to the escalator to go upstairs. We arrive at the top, my count is still three boys, so we head off. There was some kid, about 8 or 9 years old, that walks up next to me and says "He's by the glass." My thought was, who is "He" and what is he drinking out of the glass, but I just stared at the crazy kids who obviously has turrets syndrome. He just looked at me and said it again, "He's by the glass." Now I'm starting to freak out thinking this little kid is possessed, more on that later. All of the sudden, I get that panicked feeling, like Marcy is about to kill me, so I do a quick kid count, one, two, oh shit, no three. Click, it all makes sense now, turrets boy was telling me that kid #3 was by some glass. Not completely helpful, since we are in a mall full of glass, but I know I need to go in the other direction, so I yell at Tinkerbell and Fluffy and we run back to find Spaz leaning on a glass wall that overlooks that damn escalator. What is the deal with moving stairs that has my kids so fascinated? Max has now made a female friend which does me no good, because Marcy won't let me date and I figured mothers day was a bad time to bring it up anyway. Plus, if I loose a kid on mothers day, I'm guessing the gifts I bought would seem trivial. The lady laughed when I came flying back and gathered up my kitty to head home.
Marcy and I watched Premonition Friday night, starring Sandra Bullock. If you haven't seen it, it's a little weird. Not my typical movie, but Marcy knows I have a thing for Sandra, so she used that to get a movie she knew I would never pick. There was a preview for a movie, and I don't know what the name was, that freaked me out. I don't watch scary movies, because I'm a scaredy cat (what is it with the cat references?) so I stick to comedies or action films. This movie, and I only saw the preview mind you, would probably reduce me to a whimpering pile of crybaby. Wholly crap, I can't believe people can even think to write something like that. There was a little kid in it, he wasn't possessed, but he might as well have been. He freaked me out just looking at him. If he were my kid, I'd move and not leave a forwarding address. Anyway, we got through the preview and watch Sandra in her flick, discussed some of the things that we didn't get and were ready to go to sleep. Now my mind keeps going back to that damn preview from 2 hours ago and I can't sleep. I left the TV on, timer set to turn it off in an hour. I figured that gave me time to sort the images I had seen that night and get to sleep. Now, for some reason, my TV decided to do a very loud static sound for about 1/10th of a second, but about 5 times louder than the sound was set. I swear I thought I was having a heart attack. Why does shit like that happen to me? You might think I made that part up to try and slip in some humor to my blog, but I swear it's true. Marcy woke up a bit startled as well, but I don't think she was as freaked out as me to begin with. We both laughed it off, but I'm telling you, those movies are evil. By the way, does anyone know how to get urine stains out of sheets? No reason, just asking.

Mothers Day

I hope those of you that are mothers had a good day and I hope those that still have your mothers around, called them to tell them how much you love them. Since I lost my mom several years ago, Mothers Day is a time for me to reflect back on my life and the way it is because of how I was raised. I learned a lot of lessons from each of my parents, I had four, but I think the loss of my mom was especially hard. I can remember a few years after she died, I was up in a tree removing some branches that broke off in an ice storm. I was way too old to be up in a tree, but I didn't realize that until I was all ready up there and was trying to plot my way down. As I sat there, laughing at myself, I actually thought, "I need to call mom and tell her about this." That was at least two years after she died, so I know the reality of it still hadn't set in. I'm not sure it ever will. Finding out the day after her funeral that I would be loosing my dad as well, well that just sucked. Mom was always there for advice, and was a big part in my sense of humor. Now days, I don't have my mom to talk to or ask for advice, but I get to watch another great mother up close and personal. Marcy takes care of our boys like no other and is leading them down a path of life that I can only watch in awe. Her faith, that she shares with everyone she meets, is teaching our boys how to live their lives and how they should treat other people. She is the most loving and caring person I have ever met, and I'm proud to call her my wife.

I Love You Marcy!

Horse or Dog? You be the judge.

I was on my way back to work after lunch today and saw tiny here:

Update on the basement:

It's progressing. I posted pictures after Monday, he didn't show Tuesday, but called to say he wouldn't be there. Wednesday, no call no show. I left a message, he showed Thursday and did all of the inside corners (and they look good mind you). Called this morning and "said" he would be there today. Fingers crossed.

Here was the pile of hail stones at 3:30am the other day. The picture is a little out of center, I was standing in the open doorway, in the rain, at 3:30am, in my underwear. (not a pretty picture)(not sure why this is all underlined) Here are current pictures of the basement. You can see that the seams are taped, but if you read the last post, the corner bead was supposed to be on. I had my first blip with my drywall guys, they called to say they wouldn't be here today. Lets hope they show tomorrow.

All right Lisa, I will cut you some slack, but to the rest of you, nothing for you at Christmas. (so, same as last year)



As I sit hear on a beautiful spring day in Iowa, no sarcasm, it actually is fantastic, I'm as happy as can be. Today was the day the drywall guys started the mud and tape job in my basement. This has literally taken me 5 years to get to this point, maybe longer. Not that I've worked on it solid, in fact, there were stretches that went a year or longer with no progress. Now, I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Today they covered the seams, tomorrow they will start the corner bead and hopefully at the end of the week, they will be done or very close. Anyone want to paint? It has been suggested that I rent a paint sprayer, maybe I will, but the boys really want to paint and this is an opportunity to set them loose. The floor is covered with paper, there is no carpet underneath and there is no trim to go around. The windows and door openings are covered with plastic and there doesn't "appear" to be very many areas that they can cause damage. Hopefully, the rest of the week goes as well. I'm never really comfortable leaving my house open to people I don't know, but so far I don't see anything missing, so I guess they are OK.



The guy I offered a job too, excepted. Another reason to be happy. He starts in 2 weeks and I can only hope that he is as together as he seemed during the interview. If not, he is a temp to hire, so I can decide not to hire him full time, if necessary. Hopefully that won't be the route we take. All in all, a good day.

WOW, that stings!

I mentioned on my last posted that if you didn't hear from me, I might have died, or at least become violently ill, from a questionable yogurt. I haven't posted in over a week and not one inquiry as to my current health situation. Nice. Now don't send me emails claiming you saw me around town or "assumed" I was fine, seeing as you hadn't heard anything from Marcy. She'd be so busy figuring out how to spend the insurance money, there is no way she could inform you of what school she had donated my body too. (lets see if she reads my blog anymore, with that last sentence) As you can now figure out, I wasn't killed by spoiled yogurt, in fact, today's container looked worse than the last, and I ate it. Either yogurt can look pretty bad and still be good, or my stomach has hardened over the years with the constant supply of jalapenos I eat.

A few things going on right now:

1. I have been looking for a replacement for one of my guys at work. Well, I finally found one, so lets hope he excepts our offer soon so we can get him in place and fully confused before I'm gone for 3 weeks straight.

2. On that note, the week before I start my 2 week vacation in NC, I will spend in Buena Park, CA, working in a couple of my warehouses. BP is around the LA, Long Beach area. I'm looking forward to it, but it will be tough to be gone a week, then get home, pack and hit the road for 2 more weeks. I've complained enough about not being allowed to go to these warehouses, when they finally say OK, I can't really turn them down. I'll be back in BP in Jan., that's when Marcy will go with me to spend some time, just the two of us.(making castles in the sand, just the two of us, you and I)(Anyone get that was a song?)

3. Makiah has a friend, Jarret, that lives down the street from us. Jarret was kind enough to teach Makiah how to give the finger the other day, gotta love that. I know he would have learned it, eventually, but he is a kindergartner, can't it wait. I, myself, used to be an expert at the finger. In my old age, I've given up the habit for a couple of reasons. One, the fear of the dumbass I'm flipping off will flip out and kill me, over a/the finger. There are a lot of short fuses out there. Two, I actually feel it isn't worth the effort to raise my arm, extend the finger, and then yell the obscenities that must follow. Rarely is there a time where the finger is enough, and frankly, I don't have the dedication to the sport as I use to.

4. Mason has begun his second season of baseball. He had a game the other night and he actually hit a ball after the pitch bounced in front of the plate. Lisa, has Jordan ever hit a pitch that bounced in front of the plate? Apparently, Mason thinks he should swing at every pitch, including ones that are better suited for a game of cricket.(see my Jamaica posts to read about my cricket experience) I've tried to tell him to be more selective, but obviously, I'm not getting through. He had no opportunities in the field, since they put all of the kids out at the same time which means there are 6 outfielders and 100 kids in the infield, at least it appears to be 100. They can strike out this year, which confused Mason, so I'm not sure they covered that in their one practice. I did see an actual complete play with the batter hitting the ball to one of the right fielders, who in turn threw the ball to the second baseman, who was standing on first, for an out. Two batters later, with a guy on first, the ball was hit to the "pitcher" (he doesn't actually pitch, the coach does), the pitcher threw the ball to second base to get the advancing runner, but the second baseman was nowhere to be found. Thankfully, it wasn't supposed to be Mason, so I laughed. They might want to put tethers on these kids to keep them in the vicinity of their actual spot. Just a thought.

5. After a long 5 year process, the basement will be mud and taped on Monday. Holy crap, this has been a long time coming. The carpet is all ready in Des Moines, so I figured I better get the walls done so I can have it installed. We'll still have to paint, but I can do that, the mud I cannot. I've done little bits and pieces and after clogging my lungs with drywall dust, coughing up half a lung, I've decided to pay a professional. I'm hoping they can be done next week, we can get it painted quickly and be ready to host an MMA fight party on the 24th.

6. We went to a concert last week with Casting Crowns, Leeland and another guy that I forgot his name. Marcy and I are big Casting Crown fans, so this is probably the 5 or 6th time we have seen them. They are always good. The last time I saw them in Iowa, I showed you my seat, behind a poll.

This time, I can say was much better. We were in the balcony, but since there were so many empty seats on the floor, they were giving people the option to move down. We stayed up, it's much easier to see from above than trying to see over someone like me. Most everyone else in our area, however, moved down, making our area much better. The singers next to me were much better as well, my friend Joe on one side and Marcy on the other. I knew they could both read, since the lyrics are on the screen, so I wouldn't have the problem I did last time of the lady next to me singing the wrong words, very distracting. I found a new song that I really like, by Leeland. It's called Opposite Way.

That's it for now. Hope all are well.(not that I care:)